Dont Be Cruel
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When a playboy falls for a nerd, chemistry results in an explosive reaction! Playboy Maya catches studious Nemugasa cheating on a test, and to ensure his silence, Maya blackmails Nemugasa into doing whatever he wants! But is this merely just a ruse so Maya can spend more alone time with him? Maya and Nemugasa plan a big date, but Maya totally flubs it! To ensure he could get the time off, Maya had crammed his work schedule so full he exhausted himself and fell asleep on the big day. Nemugasa is already extremely sensitive about their relationship, and this only makes matters worse. Now finding his time with Maya to be painful, Nemugasa boldly declares he wants some space. Could this spell the end for this troubled couple?
A law-student stripper, two inept hitmen, the First Church of Elvis, Scientist, and a small-time mobster's biggest scam. Things are about to get all shook up in this hilarious novel filled with explosions, attempted murder, intrigue, and a whole lot more. Indescribable…except…in a word. FUNNY. PRAISE FOR MIKE ARGENTO & DON'T BE CRUEL “It’s an understatement to say that Mike Argento is a funny writer. His wit unfolds across every character, scene and scenario of ‘Don't Be Cruel.’ Virtually every page elicits grins and frequent gut-busting laughs. I’ll never sit in a church pew again without looking at the altar and imagining the worship service at the First Church of Elvis, Scientist.” - Mike Leonard, columnist, The Herald Times, Bloomington, Ind. “Who would've thunk Mike Argento had it in him to write anything as consistently funny, profane and gratuitously outrageous as ‘Don't Be Cruel?’ If Spew, Nunn, ‘Traci with an I,’ the First Church of Elvis, Scientist and the whole crew don't put you in cracked ribbed territory early and often, well, you might as well tie a tag around your own big toe and go work for Rick Santorum. This is a deeply American tragicomedy, rooted in postmodern sensibility, insouciant nihilism and hillbilly smarminess. There's even a little sweetness stabbing around the contours of its narrative heart, which beats as solidly as anything this side of St. Vonnegut. It races along like those early Elvis Costello records, pulling you by the throat into some pretty dark corners thanks to its irresistible rhythms. Argento delights in kicking us in the balls while proclaiming his undying love.” - Tony Norman, columnist, Pittsburgh Post Gazette “In his first novel, the delightfully goofy ‘Don't Be Cruel,’ Mike Argento proves once again he's a twisted bastard with a heart of gold. This crime caper novel is filled with classic Argento observations of true life absurdities that devoted readers of his columns (and there are more than a few of us) will immediately recognize and appreciate. He’ll hate me for saying it, but his sentimental side is on fine display in ‘Don't Be Cruel.’ As I have done countless times, I'm simultaneously shaking my head head wondering, ‘What the hell is wrong with that boy?’ as I'm smiling and thinking, ‘Awwwwww.’” - Lauri Lebo, author, “The Devil in Dover: An Insider's Account of Darwin v Dogma in Small Town America” "Bizarre, clever and full of pitch black humor, ‘Don’t Be Cruel’ is one hell of a debut novel! Argento's voice, prose, and wit are sharp as razors." - Brian Keene, bestselling author of “Ghoul” and “Darkness on the Edge of Town” "Mike wrote a book?" - Jack Mayer, postal worker, musician
Playboy Maya catches studious Nemugasa cheating on a test and, to ensure his silence, blackmails him into doing whatever Maya wants. Twice a week, Nemugasa must go to Maya’s room for some steamy action, but as dense and oblivious as Nemugasa is, he fails to notice Maya’s true feelings for him. With college entrance exams around the corner, Nemugasa must focus on his studies, but Maya won’t stop distracting him, causing him to finally snap! Can a relationship built on blackmail ever become something more?
Maya and Nemugasa plan a big date, but Maya totally flubs it! To ensure he could get the time off, Maya had crammed his work schedule so full he exhausted himself and fell asleep on the big day. Nemugasa is already extremely sensitive about their relationship, and this only makes matters worse. Now finding his time with Maya to be painful, Nemugasa boldly declares he wants some space. Could this spell the end for this troubled couple? -- VIZ Media
Polite and proper college student Akira Takanashi has a secret. Back in high school, he fell deeply in love with his teacher but was spurned. Now, whenever the pain of his heartbreak gets to be too much, he finds comfort in the arms of med student and notorious playboy Shimakawa—very adult comfort. Shimakawa would gladly go out with him, but Akira’s past heartbreak means he insists on keeping things strictly physical—well, until his obsessed younger brother Jutta arrives to disrupt this comfortable routine! -- VIZ Media
It’s been a while since Maya and Nemugasa have had any alone time, so they can’t help but go a little overboard when they finally see each other! But later that same night, Maya sneaks out to help his friend Ruka after he’s had a severe asthma attack. When Nemugasa asks him the next morning where he went, Maya quickly changes the subject. Is a bad habit from Maya’s playboy days rearing its ugly head? And what will Nemugasa do when he finds out the truth? -- VIZ Media
Playboy Maya catches studious Nemugasa cheating on a test, and to ensure his silence Maya blackmails Nemugasa into doing whatever he wants! Maya and Nemugasa are now officially lovers, but it's the summer of their third year of high school, meaning even more studying for college entrance exams. Their relationship is reduced to stealing kisses over lunch recess and the occasional sleepover. Stressed and desperately wanting some alone time, the two wind up having a massive—even dangerous—misunderstanding! Things only get worse when the two eventually end up attending separate colleges, meaning they will no longer see each other every day. How will Nemugasa handle Maya’s continued popularity with the ladies? And can Maya accept Nemugasa making a new college friend?
Maya and Nemugasa’s relationship had a rocky start. Maya, the playboy slacker, and Nemugasa, the diligent student, have two very different personalities and live two very different lives. These differences have led to some crazy misunderstandings between them. Their relationship certainly is a rough one, but it makes the good times that much sweeter. Read on for a collection of never-before-seen Don’t Be Cruel side and bonus stories! -- VIZ Media
After nearly breaking up, Maya and Nemugasa finally go on their hot spring vacation, where their passions reignite! In fact, Maya becomes so besotted with Nemugasa that he gives him a couple’s ring to “ward off any poachers.” But after their return, Maya is approached by the mysterious Ruka, leaving Nemugasa as the jealous one. Is the shoe finally on the other foot? -- VIZ Media